Poo Pants and Santa

I was fully prepared to return to the Mega Porn Sale once I realized all those paperbacks could be worth a hot dollar. I also knew I could convince Erin to come because the person who lived there seemed to have a ton of sports-related paper memorabilia and Timmy has trained Erin in the art of spotting when it is or isn’t valuable.  

We got a late start but finally returned. I advised Erin to start in the back yard where all of the papers were. I went back down to the basement and much to my dismay, a fellow porn-seeker had nabbed all of the paperbacks (except for the ones in super rough shape.) Still, I hung out in the room of porn and entertainment mags and ended up finding an issue of Life with Manson on the cover, and some old People and Time magazines about the Star Wars movies. I also found an issue of Hustler that seemed too weird to pass up. Erin snapped a picture of me sorting through the mess: 

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The first day of the sale, there was a person in the room at all times, making sure no kids entered. On the second day, this wasn’t the case. So at one point, I see two little boys walk in and think, “Oh man… what am I supposed to do here?” because I’ve heard horror stories from other people when they’ve tried to “parent” a stranger’s kids. After a solid minute or two of no parents in sight, I asked them if their mom was nearby and said that this room wasn’t for kids. They left, thankfully.

It took Erin forever to get inside the house, which seemed like a good sign, and it was. But I’ll let her inform you about her finds. A few minutes after she got into the porn room, an older guy came in and the two boys were back again! Apparently he was their grandpa and they were showing him some toy they found. He told them they had to leave the room and then shouted out to them, “…And don’t touch anything in this house!” Erin and I both started cracking up, as did the grandpa. 

There were two other sales nearby that didn’t look that great, but why pass them up? At the first of these, I found two cool rag rugs and a holiday sweater that I will wear proudly and without irony. Here is one thing I did not buy…

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…but only ‘cause it was empty! 

I found an old Superman mug and a vintage pasta maker at the next sale, both to sell. 

On the way to the last sale, we got a “snack” of Taco Bell cheesy gordita crunches (don’t judge (I got beans, not meat)) and after that tasty treat, Erin asked if I had a treat, which I often do. I gave her a Lindt truffle and as she was unwrapping it, it occurred to me that it was probably all melted from being in my bag all day. Bottom line: the truffle exploded onto Erin’s lap, so I kept making fun of her poo pants for the rest of the day because I’m a fantastic friend.

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That was taken after she tried to clean it up with a taco bell napkin and water. Always a Girl Scout. 

The chocolate explosion occurred right before we were going into the last sale of the day, which was the best by far in terms of interesting things to look at. It was packed with stuff, the prices were fair, and lots of the stuff was really neat. I found some cool vintage wrapping paper and a ton of vintage cards that were bundled into different groups, and priced really reasonably. My favorite lot was this lot of cards from a baby shower in the '50s. 

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If these are something you’re interested in purchasing, you’re in luck

I found a bunch of cool things at this sale, but this entry is getting long, so I’ll show you the best one: 

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That is indeed a hanger with a St. Bernard head. And only $3! 

Right before we were leaving (they let us stay after closing time), I noticed this giant Santa that I had somehow not noticed for the 30 minutes I had been in the basement. It was super cool and old and wood, and marked $20, so I knew one of us had to take it home. I showed it to Erin and we admired it, and then she remembered that her dad really wanted some sort of old timey Santa for his house at Christmastime. We weren’t sure it was going to fit in the car because of its giganticness, but again, because we were both Girl Scouts, we made it work. Here is a picture of us with Santa inside Erin’s parents’ house: 

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Don’t ask what I’m wearing. 

-Sarah

Update from Erin: As Sarah mentioned, I went straight for the newspaper stacks outside at the “porn sale.”  It was 100 degrees out that day, and there were so many boxes stacked up to sort through.  I am SO BAD in the heat.  One time I threw up in the magical bushes at Disney World because I got heatstroke.  (Fun fact–this was actually the first time I threw up in the magical bushes.  Years later, I choked on a pill and threw up in said bushes again.)

So I am sweating like mad and moving all of these boxes around.  At one point I was sure I was going to pass out.  Lucky for me, this person was pretty organized in their newspaper hoarding, so eventually I figured out a good system to get through the boxes quicker.  Each box was a different year, so I just scanned the top papers in each box until I saw 1968.

I sorted through this box and ended up with a giant stack of Detroit Tigers World Series papers and scorebooks.  I was thrilled!  Timmy went through the stack later that day and estimated that I could make about $200 once everything is sorted and sold.  I paid $5 for all the papers.

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That is just a small sampling of the papers I found.  Those Michigan football programs in the stack were found inside the house.  Again, this person was pretty organized.  There was a stack of manila envelopes and a few were labeled “Michigan Ohio State.”  I just grabbed all of those because I knew they would be most collectible.  Inside these programs are ticket stubs from the games too!

At the second sale I found an item that I would previously have considered a “holy grail.”  Zach and I are pretty obsessed with the Zodiac Killer, and both just finished reading a book about the case.  The lead suspect in the case wore a Zodiac brand watch.  I have never seen one of these in person, and we see TONS of watches at every sale.  Lo and behold, I found one.  It was pretty beat up, but it was still so cool to have as a collectible.  It was $5.

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After doing some research, Zach and I realized that these watches are pretty collectible! I listed it on ebay and it’s getting a lot of interest.  The watch is rolled gold, and an automatic, which make it even more valuable.  I hope to find another one of these in better condition one day, and keep it.

The last sale had the best items by far.  I bought an old metal Coleco hockey game to sell, some Seiko watches to sell, and this adorable little guy:

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Now that I know how collectible old rubber face toys are, I look for them everywhere.  In fact, I found this amazing blog all about these guys.  You can check it out here if you’re a fan of these toys too.

-Erin

P.S. My dad got home really late the night that Sarah and I dropped off Santa at his house.  He said that when he came inside he started screaming and running because he thought that Santa was an intruder.  BEST.



Accidental Dark Worlds: Vintage “Bulge” Photographs

Immediate disclaimer: Erin thinks some of our posts are getting too sexy, but I’m fine with that. 

So, once again, I’ve found myself learning about something sexy that I didn’t intend to learn about. Today I started researching how much a vintage boy’s suit might go for on eBay, since this cute outfit has been laying around my house for a few weeks: 

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When you look for completed listings on eBay for “vintage boys suit,” you find a lot of different kinds of items. You find vintage sailor suits, vintage ceramic figurines of children in bunny suits, and then I started noticing something weird. REALLY weird. I was seeing a lot of vintage photographs of boys and young men in bathing suits. And these photographs were selling for a lot of money. This one was the first I noticed that sold for a crapload of money. It seems totally benign. A dad, holding the shoulders of his son. 

But still, I felt creeped out, so I immediately called Erin and told her to take a look. We both thought the same thing–creepy pervs all over the land were scooping up these vintage photographs of boys in bathing suits. But then Erin asked a good question… why? Why do they need to own the photograph if that’s the purpose? Anyway, it gets better. Or worse, depending on how you’re viewing this. 

We started noticing that some of these pictures had the word “bulge” in the title, and then others also had “gay interest” in the titles. So I told Erin that maybe gay men like to use these cool, period pieces to decorate their homes. She seemed skeptical, but I still think that could be it. Maybe that’s wishful thinking. Anyway, if you happen to stumble across a vintage photograph of young men in bathing suits, or any outfit really, where you can see a “bulge,” you might want to consider selling it on eBay, because you could make hundreds of dollars

Erin and I talked about how ethical it is or isn’t to sell these items. I’m really not sure how I feel about this. I guess because I don’t really know for sure what the reason is behind the popularity of these items, I’m making a lot of assumptions that are leading me to feel creeped out. But there’s definitely a fine line–there are plenty of pictures up there of little boys in bathing suits that sell for $30-$50, and I honestly can’t think of a GOOD reason for someone to want these pictures, unless they just happen to be collectors of vintage photographs, or have an interest in vintage swimwear. I’m sort of doubtful that that’s the reason, but anything’s possible. 

But in terms of the “bulge” photos of sailors or other seemingly LEGAL young men in swimwear, I’m cool with people buying those, and I’d be cool with selling them. I love vintage photographs. Why wouldn’t someone who likes well-endowed hot old timey dudes want these pics?

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Anyway, yes, I know it seems like I am obsessed with all things pervy, but really, I just fall into these situations.

Also, if someone would like a vintage boy’s suit, size 4, created out of zodiac-themed fabric, look no further.

-Sarah

Update from Erin: When Sarah first called me about this, I wasn’t really following what she was saying.  I heard her mention “Zodiac” so I got really excited that she or someone had figured out who the Zodiac killer was.  That was pretty wishful thinking on my part, as she was really just rambling on about that Zodiac patterned children’s suit she had bought.

Anyway, this whole “bulge” photo thing is quite the mystery.  The insanely high prices being paid for these photographs makes me think we are missing the full story here.  Would a perv really spend so much money on these pics when they can probably get free images from their evil co-conspirators in the internet underworld?  

I guess gay collectors–we’ll call them gaylectors–might be a reasonable hypothesis for this phenomenon. So for the record, let me say that the bathing suit pics of well-endowed GROWN men are pretty cool.  Like Sarah, I would totally buy them and sell them (especially because it could make us rich).  

That leaves the pics of little boys (like seriously young boys) in bathing suits being sold and advertised as “bulge” or “topless”  VERY SUSPECT.  I really cannot think of any good explanation for this.  But maybe I can email Nancy Grace and she will bust it wide open.